Blue Skies and Sea Breezes

Following a recent trip to the coast, I came back feeling refreshed the sea air and gentle waves had taken my busy everyday thoughts away and replaced them with a calm and peace for a few days.

I felt grounded and reminded that we are like small grains of sand; existing for a moment in time. The chalk coastline a reminder of what lies beneath.

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Steps in the East Pt1

I am travelling in Cambodia right now and at the start of the trip I was at Heathrow airport about to start my travels to South East Asia when I really felt my Dad’s presence with me. When he was younger he started his travels around western Africa when talking about his journey to the UK he talked about the journey as being on of adventure. I actually have a recording of him talking about he travels from Nigeria that once I have completed editing the sound file I will share in the future.

So I am at the airport and even though I wasn’t there (I met up with my Dad in Nigeria on his last trip there which was a long time coming) I think about the excitement he must have felt and the changes to travelling since his early days of travelling. Also it felt a little sad that this was the first long haul flight that I had taken since we said goodbye. He loved to hear about adventures we had been on and loved looking at out pictures.

My first feelings since arriving here have been that it really reminds of Nigeria, (Ibadan and Lagos) in particular Phnom Penh obviously with a south-east asia flavour.

An enquiry about my general health and the weather.

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Dad, Southbank, London, 2008

A typical phone call with my dad involved the initial enquiry about my general health, the weather; when residing in Scotland this part of the conversation could take several minutes to discuss before moving on to the topics of the day.

He was my parental google albeit with limited parameters he had had a wide range of experiences in his 80+ years and I was always realising he had lived through several major historical events.

The day they announced another general election in 2017 so soon after the last one the year before was a day his passing a few weeks early really hit home. It was an event I would have looked forward to discussing with him.  Tears came to my eyes as I read the headlines at work realising that there were no discussions to be had with dad.

This post was written in response to  Daily Prompts, Typical.

And Uncle too.

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Uncle June 2016

Uncle wasn’t really my uncle but what do you call someone who is a cousin to your dad and a few years older? You call them Uncle. He had a very distinct gravelly voice, as far as I know, he had never smoked but I could be wrong. There will always be questions you wished you asked when a loved one passes on. In old family photos there is usually a picture of Uncle in the background, smiling. He once stayed a week to help redecorate our living room. It was fun to have him around for that week and great to look at the walls and remember him.

When visiting my dad it’s very difficult for me to drive away without going to visit Uncle. He was buried in an Islamic cemetery not too far away five months before my dad passed.

On my last visit to see him, he had complained of not feeling well and he mentioned that he thought that he did not have long. Seeing my naturally concerned expression he told me not to be sad, he was ready he had been happy with his life to date there were a few things that he was unhappy about but on the whole, he was at peace and ready to go.

Where to start?

Its the begining of week 5 of the AW and at the last meeting we talked about things we need to grieve for I wrote my dad. It was a year to the day that he had passed, moved on it’s still a very recent journey that me and my family have begun. But I realise that from now one I can no longer think this time last year he was still with us. Because I have been blogging intermittently for the last four or five years I choose this medium to continue the next part of the journery after year 1. I want to continue to celebrate him like we did at the start of this journey. He lives on in my heart but for now I want him to also live on in the online world a world he was aware of but never joined.